Freebsd Fortunes 4

I got this powdered water -- now I don't know what to add.
                -- Steven Wright

I got tired of listening to the recording on the phone at the movie
theater.  So I bought the album.  I got kicked out of a theater the
other day for bringing my own food in.  I argued that the concession
stand prices were outrageous.  Besides, I hadn't had a barbecue in a
long time.  I went to the theater and the sign said adults $5 children
$2.50.  I told them I wanted 2 boys and a girl.  I once took a cab to
a drive-in movie.  The movie cost me $95.
                -- Steven Wright

I got vision, and the rest of the world wears bifocals.
                -- Butch Cassidy

I GUESS I KINDA LOST CONTROL because in the middle of the play I ran up
and lit the evil puppet villain on fire.

No, I didn't. Just kidding.  I just said that to illustrate one of the
human emotions which is freaking out.  Another emotion is greed, as when
you kill someone for money or something like that.  Another emotion is
generosity, as when you pay someone double what he paid for his stupid
puppet.
                -- Jack Handley, The New Mexican, 1988.

I GUESS I'LL NEVER FORGET HER.  And maybe I don't want to.  Her spirit
was wild, like a wild monkey.  Her beauty was like a beautiful horse
being ridden by a wild monkey.  I forget her other qualities.
                -- Jack Handley, The New Mexican, 1988.

I guess I've been so wrapped up in playing the game that I never took
time enough to figure out where the goal line was -- what it meant to
win -- or even how you won.
                -- Cash McCall

I guess I've been wrong all my life, but so have billions of
other people...  Certainty is just an emotion.
                -- Hal Clement

I GUESS OF ALL MY UNCLES, I liked Uncle Caveman the best. We called him
Uncle Caveman because he lived in a cave and because sometimes he'd eat
one of us.  Later, we found out he was a bear.
                -- Jack Handley, The New Mexican, 1988.

I guess the Little League is even littler than we thought.
                -- D. Cavett

I GUESS WE WERE ALL GUILTY, in a way.  We shot him, we skinned him, and
we all got a complimentary bumper sticker that said, "I helped skin Bob."
                -- Jack Handley, The New Mexican, 1988.