Humor: Worst of Fortunes for Thursday April 2, 2015

If God wanted us to be brave, why did he give us legs? ...
If God wanted us to be brave, why did he give us legs? -- Marvin Kitman

There once was a fencer named Fisk, Whose speed was incredibly...
There once was a fencer named Fisk, Whose speed was incredibly brisk. So fast was his action, The Fitzgerald contraction, Foreshortended his foil to a disk.

There was an old hermit named Dave Who kept a dead whore in...
There was an old hermit named Dave Who kept a dead whore in his cave. He said "I'll admit I'm a bit of a shit, But look at the money I save."

Q: Why do people who live near Niagara Falls have flat...
Q: Why do people who live near Niagara Falls have flat foreheads? A: Because every morning they wake up thinking "What *is* that noise? Oh, right, *of course*!