Humor: Worst of Fortunes for Tuesday March 28, 2017

District of Columbia pedestrians who leap over passing autos...
District of Columbia pedestrians who leap over passing autos to escape injury, and then strike the car as they come down, are liable for any damage inflicted on the vehicle.

A tidy young lady of Streator Dearly loved to nibble a peter...
A tidy young lady of Streator Dearly loved to nibble a peter. She always would say, "I prefer it this way. I think it is very much neater."

There once was a man from Sydney Who could put it up to...
There once was a man from Sydney Who could put it up to her kidney. But the man from Quebec Put it up to her neck; He had a big one, now didn't he?

To his bride said the keen-eyed detective, "Can it be that...
To his bride said the keen-eyed detective, "Can it be that my eyesight's defective? Has the east tit the least bit The best of the west tit, Or is it the faulty perspective?"