Humor: Worst of Fortunes for Monday April 30, 2018

A certain young person of Ghent, Uncertain if lady or gent, ...
A certain young person of Ghent, Uncertain if lady or gent, Shows his organs at large For a small handling charge To assist him in paying the rent.

A wood-fetish busboy named Gable Is rapid, is thorough,...
A wood-fetish busboy named Gable Is rapid, is thorough, is able; But when everything's cleared, He gives way to the weird, As he lovingly busses each table.

There once was a man named McSweeny Who spilled some raw gin...
There once was a man named McSweeny Who spilled some raw gin on his weeny. Just to be couth, He added vermouth, And slipped his girlfriend a martini.

There was a young fellow named Charteris Put his hand where...
There was a young fellow named Charteris Put his hand where his young lady's garter is. Said she, "I don't mind, And higher up you'll find The place where my fucker and farter is."