Humor: Worst of Fortunes for Saturday May 12, 2018

A dulcet-voiced callgirl named Shedd, Who's cultured,...
A dulcet-voiced callgirl named Shedd, Who's cultured, well-spoken, well-bred, Had achieved some reknown For her tone going down-- There's a nice civil tongue in her head.

A fair-haired young damsel named Grace Thought it very, very...
A fair-haired young damsel named Grace Thought it very, very foolish to place Her hand on your cock When it turned hard as rock, For fear it would explode in your face.

There was a young man from Peru, Who took a long trip...
There was a young man from Peru, Who took a long trip by canoe. While staring at Venus, And rubbing his penis, He wound up with a handful of goo.

There was once a mechanic named Bench Whose best tool was...
There was once a mechanic named Bench Whose best tool was a sturdy gut-wrench. With this vibrant device He could reach, in a trice, The innermost parts of a wench.