Humor: Best of Fortunes for Sunday March 5, 2006

I WISH I HAD A KRYPTONITE CROSS, because then you could keep...
I WISH I HAD A KRYPTONITE CROSS, because then you could keep both Dracula and Superman away. -- Jack Handley, The New Mexican, 1988.

I wish there was a knob on the TV where you could turn...
I wish there was a knob on the TV where you could turn up the intelligence. They've got one called brightness, but it doesn't seem to work. -- Gallagher

Meade's Maxim: Always remember that you are absolutely...
Meade's Maxim: Always remember that you are absolutely unique, just like everyone else.

Put your brain in gear before starting your mouth in motion.
Put your brain in gear before starting your mouth in motion.