Humor: Best of Fortunes for Monday June 23, 2014

If God had meant for us to be in the Army, we would have been...
If God had meant for us to be in the Army, we would have been born with green, baggy skin.

There once was a lady named Myrtle Who had an affair with...
There once was a lady named Myrtle Who had an affair with a turtle. She had crabs, so they say, In a year and a day Which proved that that turtle was fertile.

There was a young man from Peru, Who took a long trip...
There was a young man from Peru, Who took a long trip by canoe. While staring at Venus, And rubbing his penis, He wound up with a handful of goo.

Cheer Up! Things are getting worse at a slower rate.
Cheer Up! Things are getting worse at a slower rate.