Humor: Best of Fortunes for Thursday September 17, 2015

There once was a man from Sydney Who could put it up to...
There once was a man from Sydney Who could put it up to her kidney. But the man from Quebec Put it up to her neck; He had a big one, now didn't he?

After your lover has gone you will still have PEANUT BUTTER!
After your lover has gone you will still have PEANUT BUTTER!

Afternoon very favorable for romance. Try a single person...
Afternoon very favorable for romance. Try a single person for a change.

An avocado-tone refrigerator would look good on your resume.
An avocado-tone refrigerator would look good on your resume.

Beware of a tall blond man with one black shoe.
Beware of a tall blond man with one black shoe.

Break into jail and claim police brutality.
Break into jail and claim police brutality.

Celebrate Hannibal Day this year. Take an elephant to lunch.
Celebrate Hannibal Day this year. Take an elephant to lunch.