Humor: Best of Fortunes for Monday August 15, 2016

HELP! MY TYPEWRITER IS BROKEN! -- E. E...
HELP! MY TYPEWRITER IS BROKEN! -- E. E. CUMMINGS

The strong individual loves the earth so much he lusts...
The strong individual loves the earth so much he lusts for recurrence. He can smile in the face of the most terrible thought: meaningless, aimless existance recurring eternally. The second characteristic of such a man is that he has the strength...

There *is* no such thing as a civil engineer.
There *is* no such thing as a civil engineer.

There once was a man from Madras, Whose balls were made out...
There once was a man from Madras, Whose balls were made out of brass. When they clanged together, They played "Stormy Weather", And lightning shot out of his ass.

There was a young man from Dundee Who buggered an ape in...
There was a young man from Dundee Who buggered an ape in a tree. The results were quite horrid: All ass and no forehead, Three balls and a purple goatee.

Happiness is twin floppies.
Happiness is twin floppies.