Humor: Best of Fortunes for Monday August 19, 2019

There once was a lifeguard named Lee Who rescued a girl from...
There once was a lifeguard named Lee Who rescued a girl from the sea She asked how to pay, And he said "Try this way, Go down for the third time on me."

There was a young parson of Harwich, Tried to grind...
There was a young parson of Harwich, Tried to grind his betrothed in a carriage. She said, "No, you young goose, Just try self-abuse. And the other we'll try after marriage."