Freebsd Fortunes 6

The three laws of thermodynamics:
        (1) You can't get anything without working for it.
        (2) The most you can accomplish by working is to break even.
        (3) You can only break even at absolute zero.

THE THREE MOST COMMONLY-ASKED QUESTIONS AT DISNEYLAND:

1) Where's the bathroom?
2) What time does the parade start?
3) Do you sell anything without that damn mouse on it?

The three questions of greatest concern are -- 1. Is it attractive?
2. Is it amusing?  3. Does it know its place?
                -- Fran Lebowitz, "Metropolitan Life"

The three rules of international air travel:

(1)     Never fly on Aeroflot if you can possibly avoid it (this used
        to be Braniff or Aeroflot).
(2)     Never bet a whole lot of money on two little pairs unless you
        know *exactly* what you're doing.
(3)     Never sleep with anyone whose troubles are worse than your own.

The thrill is here, but it won't last long
You'd better have your fun before it moves along...

The time for action is past!
Now is the time for senseless bickering.

The time is right to make new friends.

The time spent on any item of the agenda [of a finance
committee] will be in inverse proportion to the sum involved.
                -- C.N. Parkinson

The time was the 19th of May, 1780.  The place was Hartford, Connecticut.
The day has gone down in New England history as a terrible foretaste of
Judgement Day.  For at noon the skies turned from blue to grey and by
mid-afternoon had blackened over so densely that, in that religious age,
men fell on their knees and begged a final blessing before the end came.
The Connecticut House of Representatives was in session.  And, as some of
the men fell down and others clamored for an immediate adjournment, the
Speaker of the House, one Col. Davenport, came to his feet.  He silenced
them and said these words: "The day of judgment is either approaching or
it is not.  If it is not, there is no cause for adjournment.  If it is, I
choose to be found doing my duty.  I wish therefore that candles may be
brought."
                -- Alistair Cooke

The tree in which the sap is stagnant remains fruitless.
                -- Hosea Ballou