Freebsd Fortunes 6

The nice thing about egotists is that they don't talk about other people.
                -- Lucille S. Harper

The nice thing about standards
is that there are so many of them to choose from.
                -- Andrew S. Tanenbaum

The nicest thing about the Alto is that it doesn't run faster at night.

The night passes quickly when you're asleep
But I'm out shufflin' for something to eat
...
Breakfast at the Egg House,
Like the waffle on the griddle,
I'm burnt around the edges,
But I'm tender in the middle.
                -- Adrian Belew

The notes blatted skyward as the rose over the Canada geese, feathered
rumps mooning the day, webbed appendages frantically pedaling unseen
bicycles in their search for sustenance, driven by cruel Nature's maxim,
'Ya wanna eat, ya gotta work,' and at last I knew Pittsburgh.
                -- Winning sentence, 1987 Bulwer-Lytton bad fiction contest.

The notion of a "record" is an obsolete
remnant of the days of the 80-column card.
                -- D.M. Ritchie

The number of computer scientists in a room is inversely
proportional to the number of bugs in their code.

The number of feet in a yard is directly proportional to the success
of the barbecue.

The number of licorice gumballs you get out of a gumball machine
increases in direct proportion to how much you hate licorice.

The number of UNIX installations has grown to 10, with more expected.
                -- The Unix Programmer's Manual, 2nd Edition, June 1972