Humor: Worst of Fortunes for Thursday February 12, 2015

A wonderful bird is the pelican. His mouth can hold more than...
A wonderful bird is the pelican. His mouth can hold more than his belican. He can take in his beak Enough food for a week. I'm darned if I know how the helican.

There once was a Duchess of Beever Who slept with her golden...
There once was a Duchess of Beever Who slept with her golden retriever. Said the potted old Duke : "Such tricks make me puke! Were it not for her money, I'd leave her."

There once was a man named McSweeny Who spilled lots of gin...
There once was a man named McSweeny Who spilled lots of gin on his weeney So just to be couth He added vermouth And slipped his best girl a martini.