Humor: Worst of Fortunes for Thursday January 24, 2019

A lacklustre lady of Brougham Weaveth all night at her loom...
A lacklustre lady of Brougham Weaveth all night at her loom. Anon she doth blench When her lord and his wench Pull a chain in the neighbouring room.

A mathematician named Hall Had a hexhedronical ball, ...
A mathematician named Hall Had a hexhedronical ball, And the square of its weight Times his pecker's, plus eight, Was four-fifths of five-eighths of fuck-all.

There once was a man named McGruder, Who canoed with a girl...
There once was a man named McGruder, Who canoed with a girl in Bermuder. But the girl thought it crude, To be wooed in the nude, So McGru took an oar and subduder.

There was a young man of Dumfries Who said to his girl,...
There was a young man of Dumfries Who said to his girl, "If you please, It would give me great bliss If, while playing with this, You would pay some attention to these!"

There was a young man of Greenwich Whose balls were all covered...
There was a young man of Greenwich Whose balls were all covered with spinach. So long was his tool That it wound round a spool, And he let it out inach by inach.