Humor: Best of Fortunes for Wednesday February 18, 2015

Never hit a man with glasses; hit him with a baseball bat.
Never hit a man with glasses; hit him with a baseball bat.

Never insult an alligator until you've crossed the river.
Never insult an alligator until you've crossed the river.

Never keep up with the Joneses. Drag them down to your level...
Never keep up with the Joneses. Drag them down to your level. -- Quentin Crisp

There was a young man from New Haven Who had an affair with...
There was a young man from New Haven Who had an affair with a raven. He said with a grin As he wiped off his chin, "Nevermore!"

There was a young woman in Dee Who stayed with each man she...
There was a young woman in Dee Who stayed with each man she did see. When it came to a test She wished to be best, And practice makes perfect, you see.