Humor: Best of Fortunes for Sunday February 22, 2015

A deep-throated virgin named Netty Was sucking a cock on...
A deep-throated virgin named Netty Was sucking a cock on the jetty. She said, "It tastes nice, Much better than rice, Though not quite as good as spaghetti."

There was a young lady from Hyde Who ate a green apple...
There was a young lady from Hyde Who ate a green apple and died. While her lover lamented The apple fermented And made cider inside her inside.

Carperpetuation (kar' pur pet u a shun), n.: The act,...
Carperpetuation (kar' pur pet u a shun), n.: The act, when vacuuming, of running over a string at least a dozen times, reaching over and picking it up, examining it, then putting it back down to give the vacuum one more chance...

Being Ymor's right-hand man was like being gently flogged...
Being Ymor's right-hand man was like being gently flogged to death with scented bootlaces. -- Terry Pratchett, "The Colour of Magic"

Would you care to drift aimlessly in my direction?
Would you care to drift aimlessly in my direction?