Humor: Best of Fortunes for Friday July 29, 2016

Langsam's Laws: (1) Everything depends. (2)...
Langsam's Laws: (1) Everything depends. (2) Nothing is always. (3) Everything is sometimes.

Larkinson's Law: All laws are basically false.
Larkinson's Law: All laws are basically false.

Ray's Rule of Precision: Measure with a micrometer...
Ray's Rule of Precision: Measure with a micrometer. Mark with chalk. Cut with an axe.

A tutor who tooted a flute Tried to tutor two tutors to toot ...
A tutor who tooted a flute Tried to tutor two tutors to toot Said the two to the tutor: "Is it harder to toot or To tutor two tutors to toot"

There was a young chap in Arabia Who courted a widow named...
There was a young chap in Arabia Who courted a widow named Fabia. "Yes, my tongue is as long As the average man's dong," He said, licking the lips of her labia.