Humor: Best of Fortunes for Friday January 5, 2018

There was a young girl named Sapphire Who succumbed to...
There was a young girl named Sapphire Who succumbed to her lover's desire. She said, "It's a sin, But now that it's in, Could you shove it a few inches higher?"

There was a young man who appeared To his friends with a full...
There was a young man who appeared To his friends with a full growth of beard; They at once said, "Although We can't say why it's so, The effect is uncommonly weird." -- Edward Gorey

One Bell System - it works.
One Bell System - it works.

Scratch the disks, dump the core, Shut it down, pull...
Scratch the disks, dump the core, Shut it down, pull the plug Roll the tapes across the floor, Give the core an extra tug And the system is going to crash. And the system is going to crash. Teletypes smashed to bits...