Humor: Worst of Fortunes for Friday October 18, 2013

You don't sew with a fork, so I see no reason to eat with...
You don't sew with a fork, so I see no reason to eat with knitting needles. -- Miss Piggy, on eating Chinese Food

A clever young man named Eugene Invented a jack-off machine...
A clever young man named Eugene Invented a jack-off machine. On the twenty-third stroke The fuckin' thing broke And beat both his balls to a creame.

An ARPAnaut name of Corvette Had a fetish involving the net...
An ARPAnaut name of Corvette Had a fetish involving the net. As he fondled his IMP His cock went from limp To as hard as concrete which has set.