Humor: Worst of Fortunes for the month of March, 2020

There once was a whore from Regina Who had a stupendous...
There once was a whore from Regina Who had a stupendous vagina. To save herself time, She had six at a time, And another one working behind her.

There was a young lady from Wheeling Who had a peculiar...
There was a young lady from Wheeling Who had a peculiar feeling. She laid on her back And tickled her crack And pissed all over the ceiling.

While Titian was mixing rose madder, His model reclined on...
While Titian was mixing rose madder, His model reclined on a ladder. Her position to Titian Suggested coition, So he leapt up the ladder and had 'er.

Rattling around the back of my head is a disturbing image...
Rattling around the back of my head is a disturbing image of something I saw at the airport ... Now I'm remembering, those giant piles of computer magazines right next to "People" and "Time" in the airport store. Does it bother...

A certain young sheik of Algiers Said to his harem, "My...
A certain young sheik of Algiers Said to his harem, "My dears, Though you may think it odd of me, I'm tired of just sodomy Let's try straight fucking." (loud cheers!)

A chap down in Oklahoma Had a cock that could sing La Paloma, ...
A chap down in Oklahoma Had a cock that could sing La Paloma, But the sweetness of pitch Couldn't put off the hitch Of impotence, size and aroma.

A headstrong young woman in Ealing Threw her two weeks'...
A headstrong young woman in Ealing Threw her two weeks' old child at the ceiling; When quizzed why she did, She replied, "To be rid Of a strange, overpowering feeling." -- Edward Gorey

A hearty young fellow named Yost Once had an affair with...
A hearty young fellow named Yost Once had an affair with a ghost. At the height of the spasm The poor ectoplasm Cried, "Goodie, I feel it ... almost."

A lady was seized with intent To revise her existence...
A lady was seized with intent To revise her existence misspent. So she climbed up the dome Of St. Peter's in Rome, Where she stayed through the following Lent. -- Edward Gorey

A lusty young woodsman of Maine For years with no woman...
A lusty young woodsman of Maine For years with no woman had lain, But he found sublimation At a high elevation In the crotch of a pine -- God, the pain!