Humor: Worst of Fortunes for the month of May, 2020

There once was a man from Exameter Who had a prodigious...
There once was a man from Exameter Who had a prodigious diameter But it wasn't the size That brought forth the cries 'Twas his rythm, iambic pentameter.

There once was a man from Nantucket, Whose cock was so long...
There once was a man from Nantucket, Whose cock was so long he could suck it. He said with a grin, As he wiped off his chin, If my ear were a cunt I could fuck it!

There once was a man with a hernia Who said to his doctor,...
There once was a man with a hernia Who said to his doctor, "Gol dern ya, When you work on my middle Be sure you don't fiddle With things that do not concern ya."

There once was a young man from Yuma Who attempted sex with...
There once was a young man from Yuma Who attempted sex with a puma He gave up real quick Minus nose, toes, and prick In obvious pain and ill huma.

There once was a young man from Yuma, Who told an elephant joke...
There once was a young man from Yuma, Who told an elephant joke to a puma. Now his dry bleached bones lie, Under hot Asian skies, 'Cause the puma had no sense of huma.

There was a young fellow named Prynne Whose prick was so short...
There was a young fellow named Prynne Whose prick was so short and so thin, His wife found she needed A Fuckoscope -- she did -- To see if he'd gotten it in.

There was a young lady named Grace Who would not take a prick...
There was a young lady named Grace Who would not take a prick in her "place." Though she'd kiss it and suck it, She never would fuck it-- She just couldn't relax face-to-face.

While his duchess lay practically dead, The Duke...
While his duchess lay practically dead, The Duke of Daguerrodargue said: "Can it be this is all? How puny! How small! Have destroyed this disgrace to my bed." -- Edward Gorey

Ladles and Jellyspoons! I come before you to stand behind...
Ladles and Jellyspoons! I come before you to stand behind you, To tell you something I know nothing about. Since next Thursday will be Good Friday, There will be a fathers' meeting, for mothers only. Wear your best clothes, if you don't have any,...

ACHTUNG!!! Das machine is nicht fur gefingerpoken...
ACHTUNG!!! Das machine is nicht fur gefingerpoken und mittengrabben. Ist easy schnappen der springenwerk, blowenfusen und corkenpoppen mit spitzensparken. Ist nicht fur gewerken by das dummkopfen. Das rubbernecken sightseeren keepen hands in...