Humor: Worst of Fortunes for the month of June, 2020

Love makes fools, marriage cuckolds, and patriotism malevolent...
Love makes fools, marriage cuckolds, and patriotism malevolent imbeciles. -- Paul Leautaud, "Passe-temps"

In the Garden of Eden lay Adam, Complacently stroking...
In the Garden of Eden lay Adam, Complacently stroking his madam, And loud was his mirth For on all of the earth There were only two balls -- and he had 'em.

There once was a plumber from Leigh Who was plumbing his maid...
There once was a plumber from Leigh Who was plumbing his maid by the sea. Said she, "Please stop plumbing, I think someone's coming!" Said he, "Yes, I know love, it's me."

There once was a young man from France Who waited ten years...
There once was a young man from France Who waited ten years for his chance; Then he muffed it...

There was a young girl from Dundee, From her fanny there grew...
There was a young girl from Dundee, From her fanny there grew a plum tree. No one ate the nice fruit, To tell you the truth, Because they knew it came from her tooty-toot-toot.

There was a young lady from Dumfries Who said to her boyfriend,...
There was a young lady from Dumfries Who said to her boyfriend, "It's some freeze! My navel's all bare, So stick it in there, Before both my legs and my bum freeze."

There was a young lady named Gloria Who was had by Sir Gerald...
There was a young lady named Gloria Who was had by Sir Gerald Du Maurier, And then by six men, Sir Gerald again, And the band at the Waldorf-Astoria.

There was a young lady named Grace Who would not take a prick...
There was a young lady named Grace Who would not take a prick in her "place." Though she'd kiss it and suck it, She never would fuck it-- She just couldn't relax face-to-face.

There was a young man of Devizes Whose balls were of different...
There was a young man of Devizes Whose balls were of different sizes. His tool when at ease, Hung down to his knees, Oh, what must it be when it rises!

There was a young man of Devizes, Whose balls were of different...
There was a young man of Devizes, Whose balls were of different sizes. One was so small, It was nothing at all; The other took numerous prizes.