Humor: Worst of Fortunes for Tuesday March 24, 2020

A lady was seized with intent To revise her existence...
A lady was seized with intent To revise her existence misspent. So she climbed up the dome Of St. Peter's in Rome, Where she stayed through the following Lent. -- Edward Gorey

There once was a young man from Boston Who drove around town...
There once was a young man from Boston Who drove around town in an Austin, There was room for his ass, And a gallon of gas, So he hung out his balls and he lost 'em.

There was a young girl from the coast Who, just when she needed...
There was a young girl from the coast Who, just when she needed it most, Lost her Kotex and bled All over the bed, And the head and the beard of her host.

There was a young lady of Norway Who hung by her toes in...
There was a young lady of Norway Who hung by her toes in a doorway. She said to her beau "Just look at me Joe I think I've discovered one more way."