Humor: Worst of Fortunes for the month of September, 2020

There once was a young man from Boston Who drove around town...
There once was a young man from Boston Who drove around town in an Austin, There was room for his ass, And a gallon of gas, So he hung out his balls and he lost 'em.

There once was a young man named Lancelot Whom the townsfolk...
There once was a young man named Lancelot Whom the townsfolk would look at askance a lot For when he should pass A desirable lass The front of his pants would advance a lot.

There was a young fellow named Paul Who confessed, "I have...
There was a young fellow named Paul Who confessed, "I have only one ball. But the size of my prick Is God's dirtiest trick, For my girls always ask, 'Is that all?'"

There was a young man from Boston Who rode around in...
There was a young man from Boston Who rode around in an Austin. There was room for his ass And a gallon of gas, But his balls hung out and he lost 'em.

While Titian was mixing rose madder, His model reclined on...
While Titian was mixing rose madder, His model reclined on a ladder. Her position to Titian Suggested coition, So he leapt up the ladder and had 'er.

Some men are so macho they'll get you pregnant just to kill...
Some men are so macho they'll get you pregnant just to kill a rabbit. -- Maureen Murphy

ACHTUNG!!! Das machine is nicht fur gefingerpoken...
ACHTUNG!!! Das machine is nicht fur gefingerpoken und mittengrabben. Ist easy schnappen der springenwerk, blowenfusen und corkenpoppen mit spitzensparken. Ist nicht fur gewerken by das dummkopfen. Das rubbernecken sightseeren keepen hands in...

A woman must be a cute, cuddly, naive little thing -- tender,...
A woman must be a cute, cuddly, naive little thing -- tender, sweet, and stupid. -- Adolf Hitler

Life is a game of bridge -- and you've just been finessed.
Life is a game of bridge -- and you've just been finessed.

The Least Successful Animal Rescue The firemen's strike...
The Least Successful Animal Rescue The firemen's strike of 1978 made possible one of the great animal rescue attempts of all time. Valiantly, the British Army had taken over emergency firefighting and on 14 January they were called out by...