Humor: Worst of Fortunes for Monday September 14, 2020

A fellatrix's healthful condition Proved the value of spunk...
A fellatrix's healthful condition Proved the value of spunk as nutrition. Her remarkable diet (I suggest that you try it) Was only her clients' emission.

And then there's the story that's fraught With disaster --...
And then there's the story that's fraught With disaster -- of balls that got caught, When a chap took a crap In the woods, and a trap Underneath... Oh, I can't bear the thought!

As the breeches-buoy swing towards the rocks, Its occupant...
As the breeches-buoy swing towards the rocks, Its occupant cried, "Save my socks! I could not bear the loss, For with scarlet silk floss My mama has embroidered their clocks." -- Edward Gorey

There was a young fellow named Paul Who confessed, "I have...
There was a young fellow named Paul Who confessed, "I have only one ball. But the size of my prick Is God's dirtiest trick, For my girls always ask, 'Is that all?'"

There's a vicar who's classed as nefarious, Since his shocking...
There's a vicar who's classed as nefarious, Since his shocking perversions are various... He will bugger some lad With a dildo (the cad!) While exulting, "My pleasure's vicarious!"