Freebsd Fortunes 4

His ideas of first-aid stopped short of squirting soda water.
                -- P.G. Wodehouse

His life was formal; his actions seemed ruled with a ruler.

His mind is like a steel trap: full of mice.
                -- Foghorn Leghorn

His super power is to turn into a scotch terrier.

Historians have now definitely established that Juan Cabrillo, discoverer
of California, was not looking for Kansas, thus setting a precedent that
continues to this day.
                -- Wayne Shannon

History books which contain no lies are extremely dull.

History has much to say on following the proper procedures.  From a history
of the Mexican revolution:

        "Hildago was later defeated at Guadalajara.  The rebel army was
captured on its way through the mountains.  All were courtmartialed and
shot, except Hildago, because he was a priest.  He was handed over to
the bishop of Durango who excommunicated him and returned him to the
army where he was then executed."

History has the relation to truth that theology has to religion --
i.e. none to speak of.
                -- Lazarus Long

History is curious stuff
        You'd think by now we had enough
Yet the fact remains I fear
        They make more of it every year.

History is nothing but a collection of fables and useless trifles,
cluttered up with a mass of unnecessary figures and proper names.
                -- Leo Tolstoy