Freebsd Fortunes 4

If every kid had a funny tooth to bite down on whenever the world disappointed
him, prussic acid could solve our population problems in one generation.
                -- G.C. Edmonson's Albert, "The Man Who Corrupted Earth"

If everything on the road of life seems to
be coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.

If everything seems to be going well,
you have obviously overlooked something.

If fifty million people say a foolish thing, it's still a foolish thing.
                -- Bertrand Russell

If food be the music of love, eat up, eat up.

If for every rule there is an exception, then we have established that there
is an exception to every rule.  If we accept "For every rule there is an
exception" as a rule, then we must concede that there may not be an exception
after all, since the rule states that there is always the possibility of
exception, and if we follow it to its logical end we must agree that there
can be an exception to the rule that for every rule there is an exception.
                -- Bill Boquist

If God did not exist, it would be necessary to invent him.
                -- Voltaire, "Epitres, XCVI"

If God had a beard, he'd be a UNIX programmer.

If God had intended Man to program, we'd be born with serial I/O ports.

If God had intended Man to Smoke, He would have set him on Fire.