Humor: Best of Fortunes for Friday April 27, 2012

There was a young lady from Rio Who slept with the Fornier...
There was a young lady from Rio Who slept with the Fornier trio. As she dropped her panties She said, "No andanties I want this allegro con brio."

I can mend the break of day, heal a broken heart, and provide...
I can mend the break of day, heal a broken heart, and provide temporary relief to nymphomaniacs. -- Larry Lee

I don't want people to love me. It makes for obligations...
I don't want people to love me. It makes for obligations. -- Jean Anouilh

I love you more than anything in this world. I don't expect...
I love you more than anything in this world. I don't expect that will last. -- Elvis Costello

The common cormorant, or shag, Lays eggs inside a paper...
The common cormorant, or shag, Lays eggs inside a paper bag; The reason, you will see, no doubt, Is to keep the lightning out. But what these unobservant birds Have failed to notice is that herds Of bears may come with buns And steal the bags to hold...