Humor: Best of Fortunes for Sunday June 19, 2016

There was a young man from Nantucket Whose cock was so long...
There was a young man from Nantucket Whose cock was so long he could suck it. He said with a grin, While wiping his chin, "If my ear was a cunt, I could fuck it."

There was a young man from Purdue Who was only just learning...
There was a young man from Purdue Who was only just learning to screw, But he hadn't the knack, And he got too far back -- In the right church, but in the wrong pew.

There was a young man from Siam Who said, "I go in with...
There was a young man from Siam Who said, "I go in with a wham, But I soon lose my starch Like the mad month of March, And the lion comes out like a lamb."

There was a young man in Havana, Banged his girl on...
There was a young man in Havana, Banged his girl on a player-piana. At the height of their fever Her ass hit the lever And: yes, he has no banana.

There was a young man named Crockett Whose balls got caught...
There was a young man named Crockett Whose balls got caught in a socket. His wife was a bitch So she threw the switch, And Crockett went off like a rocket.

There was a young man of Dumfries Who said to his girl,...
There was a young man of Dumfries Who said to his girl, "If you please, It would give me great bliss If, while playing with this, You would pay some attention to these!"

There was a young plumber named Lee Who was plumbing his girl...
There was a young plumber named Lee Who was plumbing his girl by the sea. She said, "Stop your plumbing, There's somebody coming" Said the plumber, still plumbing, "It's me."

Ladles and Jellyspoons! I come before you to stand behind...
Ladles and Jellyspoons! I come before you to stand behind you, To tell you something I know nothing about. Since next Thursday will be Good Friday, There will be a fathers' meeting, for mothers only. Wear your best clothes, if you don't have any,...