Humor: Best of Fortunes for Tuesday February 19, 2019

There once was a lawyer named Rex With minuscule organs...
There once was a lawyer named Rex With minuscule organs of sex. Arraigned for exposure, He maintained with composure, "De minimis non curat lex." [Trans: the law does not concern itself with small things. Ed.]

There once was a lifeguard named Lee Who rescued a girl from...
There once was a lifeguard named Lee Who rescued a girl from the sea She asked how to pay, And he said "Try this way, Go down for the third time on me."

There was a young lady from Wheeling Who had a peculiar...
There was a young lady from Wheeling Who had a peculiar feeling. She laid on her back And tickled her crack And pissed all over the ceiling.

There was a young lady of Spain Who was fucked by a monk in...
There was a young lady of Spain Who was fucked by a monk in a drain. They did it again And again and again, And again and again and again.

There was a young man from Dundee Who buggered an ape in...
There was a young man from Dundee Who buggered an ape in a tree. The results were quite horrid: All ass and no forehead, Three balls and a purple goatee.

There was a young man from Kent Whose tool was so long that...
There was a young man from Kent Whose tool was so long that it bent. To save himself trouble He put it in double And instead of coming, he went.

There was a young man from Nantucket Whose cock was so long...
There was a young man from Nantucket Whose cock was so long he could suck it. But he looked in the glass, And saw his own ass, And broke his neck trying to fuck it.

Journalism is literature in a hurry. -- Matthew...
Journalism is literature in a hurry. -- Matthew Arnold