Humor: Best of Fortunes for Tuesday March 5, 2019

A frustrated lady named Alice Used a dynamite stick for...
A frustrated lady named Alice Used a dynamite stick for a phallus. They found her vagina In North Carolina And bits of her tits were in Dallas.

There was a young girl of Cape Cod Who dreamt she'd been...
There was a young girl of Cape Cod Who dreamt she'd been buggered by God. But it wasn't Jehovah That turned the girl over, 'Twas Roger the lodger, the dirty old codger, the bugger, the bastard, the sod!

There was a young lady from Hyde Who ate a green apple...
There was a young lady from Hyde Who ate a green apple and died. While her lover lamented The apple fermented And made cider inside her inside.

Q: What's the difference between USL and the Titanic? A: ...
Q: What's the difference between USL and the Titanic? A: The Titanic had a band.