Humor: Worst of Fortunes for Monday May 9, 2016

A handsome young rodent named Gratian As a lifeguard became...
A handsome young rodent named Gratian As a lifeguard became a sensation. All the lady mice waved And screamed to be saved By his mouse-to-mouse resuscitation.

A worried young man from Stamboul Discovered red spots on...
A worried young man from Stamboul Discovered red spots on his tool. Said the doctor, a cynic, "Get out of my clinic Just wipe off the lipstick, you fool."

Captain Penny's Law: You can fool all of the people...
Captain Penny's Law: You can fool all of the people some of the time, and some of the people all of the time, but you Can't Fool Mom.

For I swore I would stay a year away from her; out...
For I swore I would stay a year away from her; out and alas! but with break of day I went to make supplication. -- Paulus Silentarius, c. 540 A.D.