Humor: Worst of Fortunes for Monday September 18, 2017

There once was a spaceman named Spock Who had a huge Vulcanized...
There once was a spaceman named Spock Who had a huge Vulcanized cock. A girl from Missouri Whose name was Uhura Just fainted away from the shock.

There was a young girl named Sapphire Who succumbed to...
There was a young girl named Sapphire Who succumbed to her lover's desire. She said, "It's a sin, But now that it's in, Could you shove it a few inches higher?"

There was a young girl of Aberystwyth Who screwed every...
There was a young girl of Aberystwyth Who screwed every man that she kissed with. She tickled the balls Of the men in the halls, And pulled on the prongs that they pissed with.

There was a young harlot from Kew Who filled her vagina with...
There was a young harlot from Kew Who filled her vagina with glue. She said with a grin, "If they pay to get in, They'll pay to get out of it too."

There was a young lady from Spain Who got sick as she rode on...
There was a young lady from Spain Who got sick as she rode on a train; Not once, but again, And again, and again, And again, and again, and again.

There was a young lady named Dot Whose cunt was so terribly...
There was a young lady named Dot Whose cunt was so terribly hot That ten bishops of Rome And the Pope's private gnome Failed to quench her Vesuvial twat.

There was a young lady named Duff With a lovely, luxuriant...
There was a young lady named Duff With a lovely, luxuriant muff. In his haste to get in her One eager beginner Lost both of his balls in the rough.

There was a young man in Norway, Tried to jerk himself off in...
There was a young man in Norway, Tried to jerk himself off in a sleigh, But the air was so frigid It froze his cock rigid, And all he could come was frappe.

To his bride a young bridegroom said, "Pish! Your cunt...
To his bride a young bridegroom said, "Pish! Your cunt is as big as a dish!" She replied, "Why, you fool, With your limp little tool It's like driving a nail with a fish!"