Humor: Best of Fortunes for Saturday September 27, 2014

A lady both callous and brash Met a man with a vast black...
A lady both callous and brash Met a man with a vast black moustache; She cried, "Shave it, O do! And I'll put it with glue On my hat as a sort of panache." -- Edward Gorey

There once was a man from Nantee Who buggered an ape in...
There once was a man from Nantee Who buggered an ape in a tree. The results were most horrid All ass and no forehead Three balls and a purple goatee.

There once was a man named McSweeny Who spilled lots of gin...
There once was a man named McSweeny Who spilled lots of gin on his weeney So just to be couth He added vermouth And slipped his best girl a martini.

There was a young man from Nantucket Whose cock was so long...
There was a young man from Nantucket Whose cock was so long he could suck it. He said with a grin, While wiping his chin, "If my ear was a cunt, I could fuck it."