Humor: Best of Fortunes for Saturday May 7, 2016

Accordion, n.: A bagpipe with pleats.
Accordion, n.: A bagpipe with pleats.

There was a young lady named Alice Who was known to have peed...
There was a young lady named Alice Who was known to have peed in a chalice. 'Twas the common belief It was done for relief, And not out of protestant malice.

There was an old woman of Ghent Who swore that her cunt had...
There was an old woman of Ghent Who swore that her cunt had no scent. She got fucked so often At last she got rotten, And didn't she stink when she spent.

Captain Penny's Law: You can fool all of the people...
Captain Penny's Law: You can fool all of the people some of the time, and some of the people all of the time, but you Can't Fool Mom.