Humor: Best of Fortunes for Tuesday June 12, 2018

The Moscow Evening News advertised a contest for the best...
The Moscow Evening News advertised a contest for the best political joke. First prize was ten years in prison; second prize, five years; third prize, three years; and there were six honorable mentions of one year each.

There was a young man, name of Fred, Who spent every Thursday...
There was a young man, name of Fred, Who spent every Thursday in bed; He lay with his feet Outside of the sheet, And the pillows on top of his head. -- Edward Gorey