Humor: Best of Fortunes for Saturday June 5, 2021

101 USES FOR A DEAD MICROPROCESSOR (1) Scarecrow...
101 USES FOR A DEAD MICROPROCESSOR (1) Scarecrow for centipedes (2) Dead cat brush (3) Hair barrettes (4) Cleats (5) Self-piercing earrings (6) Fungus trellis (7) False eyelashes (8) ...

The rich get rich, and the poor get poorer. The haves get more,...
The rich get rich, and the poor get poorer. The haves get more, the have-nots die.

There once was a lifeguard named Lee Who rescued a girl from...
There once was a lifeguard named Lee Who rescued a girl from the sea She asked how to pay, And he said "Try this way, Go down for the third time on me."

There was a young girl who begat Three babies named Nat,...
There was a young girl who begat Three babies named Nat, Pat and Tat. T'was fun in the breeding But hell in the feeding When she found there's no tit for Tat.