Freebsd Fortunes 3

God must have loved calories, she made so many of them.

God must love the common man; He made so many of them.

God rest ye CS students now,            The bearings on the drum are gone,
Let nothing you dismay.                 The disk is wobbling, too.
The VAX is down and won't be up,        We've found a bug in Lisp, and Algol
Until the first of May.                 Can't tell false from true.
The program that was due this morn,     And now we find that we can't get
Won't be postponed, they say.           At Berkeley's 4.2.
(chorus)                                (chorus)

We've just received a call from DEC,    And now some cheery news for you,
They'll send without delay              The network's also dead,
A monitor called RSuX                   We'll have to print your files on
It takes nine hundred K.                The line printer instead.
The staff committed suicide,            The turnaround time's nineteen weeks.
We'll bury them today.                  And only cards are read.
(chorus)                                (chorus)

And now we'd like to say to you         CHORUS: Oh, tidings of comfort and joy,
Before we go away,                              Comfort and joy,
We hope the news we've brought to you           Oh, tidings of comfort and joy.
Won't ruin your whole day.
You've got another program due, tomorrow, by the way.
(chorus)
                -- to God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen

God runs electromagnetics by wave theory on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday,
and the Devil runs them by quantum theory on Tuesday, Thursday, and Saturday.
                -- William Bragg

God said it, I believe it and that's all there is to it.

God save us from a bad neighbor and a beginner on the fiddle.

God shows his contempt for wealth by the kind of person he selects
to receive it.
                -- Austin O'Malley

God votes Republican.

God was satisfied with his own work, and that is fatal.
                -- Samuel Butler

Goda's Truism:
        By the time you get to the point where you can make ends meet,
        somebody moves the ends.