Humor: Worst of Fortunes for Tuesday May 19, 2020

There once was a man from Nantucket Who kept all his cash in...
There once was a man from Nantucket Who kept all his cash in a bucket. His daughter, named Nan, Ran away with a man, And as for the bucket, Nantucket. The pair of them went to Manhasset, (Nan and the man with the asset.)...

Penn's aunts made great apple pies at low prices. No one else...
Penn's aunts made great apple pies at low prices. No one else in town could compete with the pie rates of Penn's aunts.