Freebsd Fortunes 6

There are three rules for writing a novel.
Unfortunately, no one knows what they are.
                -- Maugham

There are three schools of magic.  One:  State a tautology, then ring the
changes on its corollaries; that's philosophy.  Two:  Record many facts.
Try to find a pattern.  Then make a wrong guess at the next fact; that's
science.  Three:  Be aware that you live in a malevolent Universe controlled
by Murphy's Law, sometimes offset by Brewster's Factor; that's engineering.

There are three things I always forget.  Names, faces -- the third I
can't remember.
                -- Italo Svevo

There are three things I have always loved
and never understood -- art, music, and women.

There are three things men can do with women:
love them, suffer for them, or turn them into literature.
                -- Stephen Stills

There are three ways to get something done:

        1: Do it yourself.
        2: Hire someone to do it for you.
        3: Forbid your kids to do it.

There are three ways to get something done:
do it yourself, hire someone, or forbid your kids to do it.

There are twenty-five people left in the world,
and twenty-seven of them are hamburgers.
                -- Ed Sanders

There are two jazz musicians who are great buddies.  They hang out and play
together for years, virtually inseparable.  Unfortunately, one of them is
struck by a truck and killed.  About a week later his friend wakes up in
the middle of the night with a start because he can feel a presence in the
room.  He calls out, "Who's there?  Who's there?  What's going on?"
        "It's me -- Bob," replies a faraway voice.
        Excitedly he sits up in bed.  "Bob!  Bob!  Is that you?  Where are
you?"
        "Well," says the voice, "I'm in heaven now."
        "Heaven!  You're in heaven!  That's wonderful!  What's it like?"
        "It's great, man.  I gotta tell you, I'm jamming up here every day.
I'm playing with Bird, and 'Trane, and Count Basie drops in all the time!
Man it is smokin'!"
        "Oh, wow!" says his friend. "That sounds fantastic, tell me more,
tell me more!"
        "Let me put it this way," continues the voice.  "There's good news
and bad news.  The good news is that these guys are in top form.  I mean
I have *never* heard them sound better.  They are *wailing* up here."
        "The bad news is that God has this girlfriend that sings..."

There are two kinds of fool.  One says, "This is old, and therefore good."
And one says "This is new, and therefore better."
                -- John Brunner, "The Shockwave Rider"