Freebsd Fortunes 6

This guy runs into his house and yells to his wife, "Kathy, pack up your
bags!  I just won the California lottery!"
        "Honey!", Kathy exclaims, "Shall I pack for warm weather or cold?"
        "I don't care," responds the husband. "just so long as you're out
of the house by dinner!"

This is a country where people are free to practice their religion,
regardless of race, creed, color, obesity, or number of dangling keys...

This is a good time to punt work.

This is a test of the emergency broadcast system.
Had there been an actual emergency, then you would no longer be here.

This is Betty Frenel.  I don't know who to call but I can't reach my
Food-a-holics partner.  I'm at Vido's on my second pizza with sausage
and mushroom.  Jim, come and get me!

This is clearly another case of too many mad scientists,
and not enough hunchbacks.

This is for all ill-treated fellows
        Unborn and unbegot,
For them to read when they're in trouble
        And I am not.
                -- A.E. Housman

This is Jim Rockford.
At the tone leave your name and message; I'll get back to you.

This is Maria, Liberty Bail Bonds.  Your client, Todd Lieman, skipped and
his bail is forfeit.  That's the pink slip on your '74 Firebird, I believe.
Sorry, Jim, bring it on over.

This is Marilyn Reed, I wanta talk to you...   Is this a machine?
I don't talk to machines!  [Click]