Freebsd Fortunes 6

Three Midwesterners, a Kansan, a Missourian and an Iowan,
all appearing on a quiz program, were asked to complete this sentence:
"Old MacDonald had a . . ."

        "Old MacDonald had a carburetor," answered the Kansan.
        "Sorry, that's wrong," the game show host said.
        "Old MacDonald had a free brake alignment down at the
                service station," said the Missourian.
        "Wrong."
        "Old MacDonald had a farm," said the Iowan.
        "CORRECT!" shouts the quizmaster.  "Now for $100,000, spell 'farm.'"
        "Easy," said the Iowan. "E-I-E-I-O."

Three minutes' thought would suffice to find this out; but thought
is irksome and three minutes is a long time.
                -- A.E. Houseman

Three o'clock in the afternoon is always just a little too
late or a little too early for anything you want to do.
                -- Jean-Paul Sartre

Three Rings for the Elven-kings under the sky,
Seven for the Dwarf-lords in their halls of stone,
Nine for Mortal Men doomed to die,
One for the Dark Lord on his dark throne
In the Land of Mordor where the Shadows lie.
One Ring to rule them all, One Ring to find them,
One Ring to bring them all and in the darkness bind them
In the Land of Mordor where the Shadows lie.
                -- J.R.R. Tolkien, "The Lord of the Rings"

Three rules for sounding like an expert:
        1. Oversimplify your explanations to the point of uselessness.
        2. Always point out second-order effects,
           but never point out when they can be ignored.
        3. Come up with three rules of your own.

Throw away documentation and manuals,
and users will be a hundred times happier.
Throw away privileges and quotas,
and users will do the Right Thing.
Throw away proprietary and site licenses,
and there won't be any pirating.

If these three aren't enough,
just stay at your home directory
and let all processes take their course.

Thus mathematics may be defined as the subject in which we never know
what we are talking about, nor whether what we are saying is true.
                -- Bertrand Russell

Thus spake the master programmer:
        "A well-written program is its own heaven; a poorly-written program
is its own hell."
                -- Geoffrey James, "The Tao of Programming"

Thus spake the master programmer:
        "After three days without programming, life becomes meaningless."
                -- Geoffrey James, "The Tao of Programming"

Thus spake the master programmer:
        "Let the programmer be many and the managers few -- then all will
        be productive."
                -- Geoffrey James, "The Tao of Programming"