Freebsd Fortunes 6

User hostile.

user, n:
        The word computer professionals use when they mean "idiot."
                -- Dave Barry, "Claw Your Way to the Top"

[I always thought "computer professional" was the phrase hackers used
 when they meant "idiot."  Ed.]

Using TSO is like kicking a dead whale down the beach.
                -- S.C. Johnson

Using [Windows] for any sort of serious work is like playing an old
text-based adventure game.  You're five feet from making it to your
goal, when bup-POW! a ten ton rock falls on your head.  Because you
didn't disarm the trap three hours before.  [...]

I always hated those adventure games.
                -- David Gerard

Using words to describe magic is like using a screwdriver to cut roast beef.
                -- Tom Robbins

/usr/news/gotcha

Usually, when a lot of men get together, it's called a war.
                -- Mel Brooks, "The Listener"

VACATION:
        A two-week binge of rest and relaxation so intense that
        it takes another 50 weeks of your restrained workaday
        life-style to recuperate.

Van Roy's Law:
        An unbreakable toy is useful for breaking other toys.

Van Roy's Law:
        Honesty is the best policy - there's less competition.

Van Roy's Truism:
        Life is a whole series of circumstances beyond your control.