Freebsd Fortunes 6

The Heineken Uncertainty Principle:
        You can never be sure how many beers you had last night.

"The hell with the prime directive!  Let's kill something!"

The help people need most urgently is
help in admitting that they need help.

The herd instinct among economists
makes sheep look like independent thinkers.

The heroic hours of life do not announce their presence by drum and trumpet,
challenging us to be true to ourselves by appeals to the martial spirit that
keeps the blood at heat.  Some little, unassuming, unobtrusive choice presents
itself before us slyly and craftily, glib and insinuating, in the modest garb
of innocence.  To yield to its blandishments is so easy.  The wrong, it seems,
is venial...  Then it is that you will be summoned to show the courage of
adventurous youth.
                -- Benjamin Cardozo

The higher you climb, the more you show your ass.
                -- Alexander Pope, "The Dunciad"

The History of every major Galactic Civilization tends to pass through
three distinct and recognizable phases, those of Survival, Inquiry, and
Sophistication, otherwise known as the How, Why, and Where phases.  For
instance, the first phase is characterized by the question "How can we
eat?" the second by "Why do we eat?" and the third by "Where shall we
have lunch?".
                -- Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

The history of warfare is similarly subdivided, although here the phases
are Retribution, Anticipation, and Diplomacy.  Thus:

Retribution:
        I'm going to kill you because you killed my brother.
Anticipation:
        I'm going to kill you because I killed your brother.
Diplomacy:
        I'm going to kill my brother and then kill you on the
        pretext that your brother did it.

The Hollywood tradition I like best is called "sucking up to the stars."
                -- Johnny Carson

The honeymoon is not actually over until we cease
to stifle our sighs and begin to stifle our yawns.
                -- Helen Rowland