Freebsd Fortunes 6

The party adjourned to a hot tub, yes.  Fully clothed, I might add.
                -- IBM employee, testifying in California State Supreme Court

The passionate young thing was having a difficult time getting across what
she wanted from her rather dense boyfriend.  Finally she asked,
        "Would you like to see where I was operated on for appendicitis?"
        "Gosh, no!" he replied.  "I hate hospitals."

The past always looks better than it was.
It's only pleasant because it isn't here.
                -- Finley Peter Dunne (Mr. Dooley)

The people sensible enough to give
good advice are usually sensible enough to give none.

The perfect friend sees the best in you -- sees it constantly --
not just when you occasionally are that way, but also when you
waver, when you forget yourself, act like less than you are.
In time, you become more like his vision of you -- which is the
person you have always wanted to be.
                -- Nancy Friday

The perfect lover is one who turns into a pizza at 4:00 A.M.
                -- Charles Pierce

The perfect man is the true partner.  Not a bed partner nor a fun partner,
but a man who will shoulder burdens equally with [you] and possess that
quality of joy.
                -- Erica Jong

The person who can smile when something
goes wrong has thought of someone to blame it on.

The person who makes no mistakes does not usually make anything.

The person who marries for money usually earns every penny of it.