Humor: Best of Fortunes for Thursday April 26, 2007

"According to the Rand McNally Places-Rated Almanac,...
"According to the Rand McNally Places-Rated Almanac, the best place to live in America is the city of Pittsburgh. The city of New York came in twenty-fifth. Here in New York we really don't care too much. Because we know that we could beat...

One-Shot Case Study, n.: The scientific equivalent...
One-Shot Case Study, n.: The scientific equivalent of the four-leaf clover, from which it is concluded all clovers possess four leaves and are sometimes green.

If I told you you had a beautiful body, would you hold...
If I told you you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?

There is no realizable power that man cannot, in time, fashion...
There is no realizable power that man cannot, in time, fashion the tools to attain, nor any power so secure that the naked ape will not abuse it. So it is written in the genetic cards -- only physics and war hold him in check. And also the wife...

A cautious young fellow named Lodge Had seatbelts installed...
A cautious young fellow named Lodge Had seatbelts installed in his Dodge. When his date was strapped in, He committed a sin, Without even leaving his grodge.

The Heineken Uncertainty Principle: You can never...
The Heineken Uncertainty Principle: You can never be sure how many beers you had last night.

An idea is not responsible for the people who believe in it.
An idea is not responsible for the people who believe in it.