Humor: Best of Fortunes for Saturday October 13, 2007

There once was a son-of-a-bitch, Neither clever, nor handsome,...
There once was a son-of-a-bitch, Neither clever, nor handsome, nor rich, Yet the girls he would dazzle, And fuck to a frazzle, And then ditch them, the son-of-a-bitch!

There once was an old man from Esser, Who's knowledge grew...
There once was an old man from Esser, Who's knowledge grew lesser and lesser. It at last grew so small, He knew nothing at all, And now he's a College Professor.

There was a pianist named Liszt Who played with one hand while...
There was a pianist named Liszt Who played with one hand while he pissed, But as he grew older His technique grew bolder, And in concert jacked off with his fist.

I can't mate in captivity. -- Gloria Steinem,...
I can't mate in captivity. -- Gloria Steinem, on why she has never married.