Freebsd Fortunes 3

Grelb's Reminder:
        Eighty percent of all people consider
        themselves to be above average drivers.

grep me no patterns and I'll tell you no lines.

Grief can take care of itself; but to get the full
value of a joy you must have somebody to divide it with.
                -- Mark Twain

Griffin's Thought:
        When you starve with a tiger, the tiger starves last.

Grig (the navigator):
        ... so you see, it's just the two of us against the entire space
        armada.
Alex (the gunner):
        What?!?
Grig:   I've always wanted to fight a desperate battle against
        overwhelming odds.
Alex:   It'll be a slaughter!
Grig:   That's the spirit!
                -- The Last Starfighter

Grinnell's Law of Labor Laxity:
        At all times, for any task, you have not got enough done today.

Groundhog Day has been observed only once in Los Angeles because when the
groundhog came out of its hole, it was killed by a mudslide.
                -- Johnny Carson

Grover Cleveland, though constantly at loggerheads with the Senate, got on
better with the House of Representatives.  A popular story circulating
during his presidency concerned the night he was roused by his wife crying,
"Wake up!  I think there are burglars in the house."
        "No, no, my dear," said the president sleepily, "in the Senate
maybe, but not in the House."

Growing old isn't bad when you consider the alternatives.
                -- Maurice Chevalier

Grownups are reluctant to take science fiction seriously, and with good
reason: sci-fi is a hormonal activity, not a literary one.  Its traditional
concerns are all pubescent.  Secondary sexual characteristics are everywhere,
disguised.  Aliens have tentacles.  Telepathy allows you to have sex without
any nasty inconvenience of touching.  Womblike spaceships provide balanced
meals.  No one ever has to grow old -- body parts are replaceable, like
Job's daughters, and if you're lucky you can become a robot.  As for the
adult world, it's simply not there; political systems tend to be naively
authoritarian (there are more lords in science fiction than on public
television) and are often ruled by young boys on quests.  The most popular
sci-fi book in years, Frank Herbert's Dune, sold millions of copies by
combining all these themes: it ends with its adolescent hero conquering the
universe while straddling a giant worm.
                -- Arnold Klein