Freebsd Fortunes 5

Politics is supposed to be the second oldest profession.  I have come to
realize that it bears a very close resemblance to the first.
                -- Ronald Reagan

Politics is the ability to foretell what is going to happen tomorrow, next
week, next month and next year.  And to have the ability afterwards to
explain why it didn't happen.
                -- Winston Churchill

Politics, like religion, hold up the
torches of matrydom to the reformers of error.
                -- Thomas Jefferson

Politics makes strange bedfellows, and journalism makes strange politics.
                -- Amy Gorin

politics, n:
        A strife of interests masquerading as a contest of principles.
        The conduct of public affairs for private advantage.
                -- Ambrose Bierce

Pollyanna's Educational Constant:
        The hyperactive child is never absent.

POLYGON:
        Dead parrot.

Polymer physicists are into chains.

Poorman's Rule:
        When you pull a plastic garbage bag from its handy dispenser
        package, you always get hold of the closed end and try to
        pull it open.

Pope Goestheveezl was the shortest reigning pope in the history of the
Church, reigning for two hours and six minutes on 1 April 1866.  The white
smoke had hardly faded into the blue of the Vatican skies before it dawned
on the assembled multitudes in St. Peter's Square that his name had hilarious
possibilities.  The crowds fell about, helpless with laughter, singing

        Half a pound of tuppenny rice
        Half a pound of treacle
        That's the way the chimney smokes
        Pope Goestheveezl

The square was finally cleared by armed carabineri with tears of laughter
streaming down their faces.  The event set a record for hilarious civic
functions, smashing the previous record set when Baron Hans Neizant
Bompzidaize was elected Landburgher of Koln in 1653.
                -- Mike Harding, "The Armchair Anarchist's Almanac"