Freebsd Fortunes 5
fortune: 1501 - 1510 of 2298 from freebsd fortunes 5
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Dec 14, 2017
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Freebsd Fortunes 5

Fortune: 1501 - 1510 of 2298 from Freebsd Fortunes 5

Freebsd Fortunes 5:  1501 of 2298

Punning is the worst vice, and there's no vice versa.
 
Freebsd Fortunes 5:  1502 of 2298

Puns are little "plays on words" that a certain breed of person loves to
spring on you and then look at you in a certain self-satisfied way to indicate
that he thinks that you must think that he is by far the cleverest person
on Earth now that Benjamin Franklin is dead, when in fact what you are
thinking is that if this person ever ends up in a lifeboat, the other
passengers will hurl him overboard by the end of the first day even if they
have plenty of food and water.
                -- Dave Barry
 
Freebsd Fortunes 5:  1503 of 2298

PURGE COMPLETE.
 
Freebsd Fortunes 5:  1504 of 2298

PURITAN:
        Someone who is deathly afraid that
        someone, somewhere, is having fun.
 
Freebsd Fortunes 5:  1505 of 2298

Puritanism -- the haunting fear that someone, somewhere, may be happy.
                -- H.L. Mencken, "A Book of Burlesques"
 
Freebsd Fortunes 5:  1506 of 2298

PURPITATION:
        To take something off the grocery shelf, decide you
        don't want it, and then put it in another section.
                -- "Sniglets", Rich Hall & Friends
 
Freebsd Fortunes 5:  1507 of 2298

Push where it gives and scratch where it itches.
 
Freebsd Fortunes 5:  1508 of 2298

Pushing 30 is exercise enough.
 
Freebsd Fortunes 5:  1509 of 2298

Pushing forty is exercise enough.
 
Freebsd Fortunes 5:  1510 of 2298

Put a pot of chili on the stove to simmer.
Let it simmer.  Meanwhile, broil a good steak.
Eat the steak.  Let the chili simmer.  Ignore it.
                -- Recipe for chili from Allan Shrivers, former governor
                   of Texas.
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